Wonderfully Awesome Stuff

2012 is insane!

2012-01-16T09:05:00.000-08:00

Like, literally out of its mind. And I say that in a very Chris Traeger way.

Adult Critique Entry #7

2012-01-02T08:07:00.000-08:00

Title: Killing Horizons
Genre: commercial fiction / thriller

Logline

Lena, an enigmatic Russian orphan (think Lisbeth Salander), trades her troubled past for The American Dream as a mail-order bride, and loses herself in the opulent mansion she marries into. When the au pair, obsessed with Lena, interferes with the privacy of Lena’s strange marriage – the man of the house is unforgiving, and arranges both women’s destinies as if it were his plan all along.

First 250 words

The numbing effect of the anesthesia had yet to wear off. As her wheelchair rolled to the front desk, Lena had the sensation of floating, disembodied. The front door opened, its bell clanging.
“Oh, just in time,” said the attendant. “Your ride is here?”

It took a moment for Lena to register the tall man blocking the entryway was her husband. Sweat shone on his brow, which was tight with panic. She blinked through the haze of painkillers in disbelief. How did he find me?

“My ride.” Lena’s words slid from her mouth. “You could say that.”

“Is it done?” His voice was hoarse. Feeling a pinch in her uterus, Lena hugged her midsection.
“Yup, she’s all set,” the attendant said.

Darkness deepened his features as he clenched his jaw. Behind the blur of his thick lenses, his hollow dark eyes swallowed her. She wished she could rewind time. With her other senses dulled, the yearning for Russia oppressed her. She cursed this promised land that tainted her hopes like a stain. And the girl – her only possible savior was the one who sent him here.

As if in slow motion, he moved behind her chair. Lena shuddered as his long fingers gripped the handles.

“Ready?” he said, a threat.

As her chair moved into the harsh sunlight, Lena squinted at the pavement. Tapped the foot-rails. Fantasized an escape.

How she wished they’d knocked her out.

Now that he knew what she’d done, he would not let her go unpunished.

Adult Critique Entry #6

2012-01-02T08:06:00.000-08:00

Title: The Forces of Heaven and Hell Alike

Logline

When God goes AWOL, righteous demon Liam and his angelic lover Mikael are used as pawns in the battle for the Heavenly throne. While Mikael struggles to decide how far he can go to protect his lover while serving Heaven, Liam must save him from making the choice.

First 250 words

When Liam took over the body of the railroad worker in Buffalo Gap fifty years ago, he hadn't realized he'd suffer from caffeine withdrawal every morning until he got his fix. But when he traded up, he wasn't being picky.

He was back on his Harley after only five hours of sleep, heading through Davenport, Wyoming to find the local diner. Liam promised he'd meet Sid on his way through town, but that was something he was regretting now.

Rounding the next block, the sign for the Davenport Diner came into view, and Liam headed toward the far right of the parking lot, safely away from the crowd of cars. He'd rather not be forced to do harm to some fool who scratched his bike, even by accident. The altercation in Stewart was still fresh in his mind and he didn't have the desire for a repeat.

Shutting off the engine, Liam saw Sid coming toward him, a grin plastered on his face. Unlike himself, the other demon looked like he had been up for hours, filled with energy and illegal substances. On second thought, Liam pondered as he saw Sid's appearance close-up, it was more likely he hadn't even been to bed yet.

“I need coffee,” Liam said. “Drag me out here way too early and then you're all hyper. Something's wrong with your head.”

Sid smile widened. “You always said we've got to be crazy in our line of work. I'm just living up to my reputation.”

Adult Critique Entry #5

2012-01-02T08:05:00.000-08:00

Title: The Glass Gargoyle of the Last Elven King

Logline
Taryn St. Giles will do whatever it takes to keep herself, and her three drunken faeries, off the streets including becoming a bounty hunter. Luckily, her first fugitive is as easy to catch as he is on the eyes. Unfortunately, he doesn’t stay caught and proceeds to drag Taryn into a search for long lost artifact that might just cause the end of the world. And she’s not sure whether he’s trying to stop it from being used, or not.

First 250 words

I’d been chasing the fugitive for the last two hours in the pouring rain, only to be told that he’d gone to ground in my pub. I don’t own the Shimmering Dewdrop, but I've spent plenty of time and cash I couldn’t afford there. The fact that that son of a hag was hiding in my home away from home was enough to make any self-respecting woman - bounty hunter or not - highly annoyed.

The heat from the pub felt great on my cold wet skin, and for a moment I closed my eyes and let the welcoming smells of tallow candles and cheap beer wash over me. Then winced as a snippet of song invaded my ear drums. My faeries were here. They’d broken curfew and were drunk. Crusty Bucket’s warbling voice as she sang for someone to bring her dancing minkies made me think about sneaking back out. But, if I didn’t collect the bounty on this thief, those three drunks and I were going to be out on the street tomorrow. At least until they did something to get me arrested.

I was lost in thought about my tiny drunks when I tripped over a pair of minotaurs. When they didn’t respond, I edged around them. Adjusting to the idea of having to bounty hunt for a living was hard enough; I shouldn’t have to wade through bodies on the floor to bring this guy in. Sadly, the natives were not only restless, they were homicidal.

Adult Critique Entry #4

2012-01-02T08:04:00.000-08:00

Title: Unwritten
Genre: Contemporary Romance

Logline

When a vicious smear campaign is launched against her, singer/songwriter Katherine Hayes struggles to overcome a traumatic event from her childhood to set the record straight, and discovers success is meaningless without the college professor who’s taught her how to love.

First 250 Words

Kate pressed her face into the pillow and bit back a scream. She turned her head and peeked through heavy eyelids at the red numbers glaring like angry eyes from her alarm clock. 4:13.

She whimpered. Fatigue stung her eyes. Bits of the nightmare lingered, like a residue clinging to her skin. She fought the urge to get up and take a cleansing shower.

Sleep. She needed to sleep.

She rolled to her side and took a long, slow breath.

Music sliced through the room like a shout in the silence. Kate lurched upright in bed, heart racing. The opening bars of “Dream On” played from the cell phone flashing impatiently on her bedside table.

She grabbed it. Veronica Padrón’s name showed on the display, accompanied by the photo of a Chihuahua baring its teeth.

Kate groaned as her last hope of sleep was snatched away. No good ever came from a middle of the night phone call from her publicist.

At her feet, Ben raised his fluffy Maltese head and stared at her through droopy eyes. Beside him, Jerry slept undisturbed, his feet twitching with doggy dreams.

She sighed, tucked her hair behind her ears and connected the call.

“Katie, what are you doing awake at this hour?” Vero sounded wide awake herself despite it being after one in LA.

Kate frowned. “Why are you calling me at this hour?”

Three hours of sleep wasn’t going to do much to get her through the busy day ahead. Millions of adoring fans, a shelf full of Grammys, and she still couldn’t sleep worth a damn.

But, as they say, the show must go on.

Vero chuckled. “Expecting your voice mail, for one thing. But since you’re up, let’s talk.”

Adult Critique Entry #3

2012-01-02T08:02:00.000-08:00

Title: Elysium's Conspiracy
Genre: Contemporary Fantasy

Logline

Ronnie is a holding-cell for demons, which really bites when they
start whispering cryptic messages no one else can hear. Everyone - her
boss, the gods, the creepy guy at the diner - seems to know more about
the situation than her, and no one's sharing. If she takes too long to
figure out why she's stuck with the job, and how to get rid of the
voices, her descent into madness will be a one-way trip.

First 250 words

Mortality wasn’t the epic adventure I had imagined. The thrill of
being able to taste, touch, and smell had lost some appeal the first
time I’d let the milk go bad in my fridge and didn’t realize it until
it was too late.

Smoothing my apron over my skirt, I paused near the diner kitchen. I
blew strands of black out of my eyes and resisted the urge to take off
a worn sneaker and rub my foot. Supposedly that kind of thing was
unsanitary. It wasn’t like I let the dirt stick to my hands. Talk
about gross.

_You’re such a whiner._

Great, the voices were back. That one was always loudest, taunting and
sounding disturbingly like me.

_Not worth your attention. Focus. Gentleman on table twelve._

The others ran together like mud until I couldn’t tell them apart. I
ignored the muttering of the captured demons sharing my mind. As long
as I told myself I’d be able to hand them over soon to my god, Horus,
I could block them out. Mostly.

_Soon. You’re funny. And delusional._

“Shut up.” I hoped no one heard me talking to myself. Every time I
absorbed a new demon I picked up their old host’s habits for a few
days. Talking to myself was one of my least favorite, but I’d really
had to watch myself after I took glee from nose-picking lady.

Adult Critique Entry #2

2012-01-02T08:01:00.000-08:00

Title: Sole
Genre: Alternative Fiction

Logline

It’s said you can take the measure of a man by looking at the shoes he's wearing. What if those shoes happen to be sequined with a delicate kitten heel? From the drag clubs of the East Village to the highrises of Manhattan, walk a mile in the shoes of three very different people - the female executive, the male owner of a construction firm, and a popular drag queen - and see how their lives entwine and are enriched because of the shoes they choose to put on their feet.

First 250 words

Lucinda MacHauley was a bitch, self-proclaimed and unashamed. Her parents knew it; her lover knew it; and any of her coworkers who'd had a run in with her steered clear of her because of it. Her behavior, tone of voice, and her basic overall demeanor was tolerated due to the fact that Lucinda had three older brothers, some exceptional talents in the bedroom, and was exceedingly good at her job.

Everything Lucinda did had a purpose. No movement was wasted; even the tailoring she had done on all her clothing was efficient. She was small of stature and slim, both belied her strength and the ferocity of which she could cut someone down with a stare. If she thought it necessary to talk with you, you were certainly going to leave the conversation knowing who'd been holding the talking stick most of the time, and you'd probably feel a couple of pounds lighter as she'd have torn a strip or two off of you just for kicks. And that same control, that overwhelming need to assert power was exactly what had initially attracted and had kept Hank Willis tied to Lucinda's side - or tied to her bed, depending on the evening. He was enthralled with her, and she in turn was surprised that a man like Hank had been willing to give up the reins in their relationship for an extended length of time.

Lucinda was spending a restless night at home. It was Saturday night, and after glancing briefly at her watch for the umpteenth time in the span of an hour, she realized, with a resigned sigh, that Hank had stood her up. Again.

Adult Critique Entry #1

2012-01-02T08:00:00.000-08:00

Title: Marsh Tide

Logline

Tom, suffering post-traumatic shock and survivor’s guilt, has retreated to his beloved coastal cottage to scatter the ashes of his wife, Celia, brutally murdered in Kenya.  

He unwillingly acquires a companion, a talented but mute teenager, Jack Massingham. Initially there is little communication between them, but this slowly changes as they walk the marshes and wide expanses that stir up violent echoes from Jack’s family past.

It becomes apparent that the rape and murder of Tom’s wife was the result of a calamitous error by the security forces, whilst an enigmatic friend is revealed as a Spook who may know more about what happened in Kenya.

The action is set against an intimate rendering of this landscape of marshes, dunes and sea; contrasting with the horror that Tom experiences on learning the awful truths about both Celia and Jack. Then there is another, more shocking, truth . . .

First 250 Words

I put the helm down and she comes up through the wind as sweet as maple syrup. Five thirty on an early May morning. Nothing stirs but the dog, the boat, and the tide. Sonnet leans by the mast, the long, black fur on her ears flipped occasionally by the windward jib sheet.

We near the shore; I free the main halyard, drop the gaff-rigged main and nuzzle the dinghy under foresail alone into the small creek by the Watch Hut. The prow squelches into a bed of black mud and Sonnet leaps for the cleanliness of the samphire. I smother the jib, secure both sails, heave a mud-weight over the bows, wriggle into the grey/green rucksack, and slither after my dog.

The open sea reveals itself in sound before I gain the top of the wide shingle bank; its thumps of solid water hitting at my small salty corner of this vulnerable coast.

I stare into the empty waste of the distance. No ships mitigate the loneliness of the scene or the emptiness of the world. Where sea meets sky is a line of demarcation, but it is an illusion, an unattainable horizon that retreats from all advances.

I turn in my confusion to the dog, speaking at her; not making contact. “Time now to erase that which has gone before?”

Sonnet cocks her ears forwards, head slightly to one side, concerned that I might require something of her but unable to understand what that might be.

An apology and CRITIQUES!

2012-01-01T19:51:00.000-08:00

Hey guys, sorry for being away for so long, but you know how it is with the holidays. Anyway, I'm back! And I've got surprise critiques for you! Yay!

I'll be hosting some of the adult genre entries from Authoress's (eses) Baker's Dozen (if you don't know what that is... BEHOLD! {Optic blast!*}) for a little critique sess tomorrow morning.

Now, I must write a disclaimer for these entries: I (probably) do not necessarily agree with the views, content, or wording used in these excerpts. Also, I have not read them or edited the content, just adjusted the format. Also, I think I'd better list some critique rules so it don't get ugly up in here.

1) Be constructive, but be nice

2) Keep the indecencies and potty words to a minimum, if at all. My blog font is pink, for crying out loud.

3) Have fun!

*Whoever can name this reference gets a cookie.

A Christmas Special!

2011-11-21T08:47:00.000-08:00

Hey guys! Now through Dec 15th you can get 40% off on The (Sparkly) Vampire (-Obsessed) Diaries, just in time for the holidays! All you have to do is use this code at checkout.

RYQR37XH

It only works in the createspace e-store, not if you're purchasing on Amazon. And don't forget to order early if you want it to get here before Christmas :)

Also, sorry I haven't been present lately. With my job the holidays are like none stop work. Guess I should have warned you ahead of time, huh? (Ok, I said I was sorry, geewiz! No need to yell.) Anyway, a NaNoWriMo update shall be posted tomorrow or wednesday, so stay tooned for that! In the meantime, order yourself a copy o' my book (pretty please with cherries on top.)

Things that make me vomit

2011-10-19T09:54:00.000-07:00

Oh. My. God.

Just came across the most vomit inducing article I have in a while. Not because anything in it is physically disgusting, but just because of this one word: "white."

It's about these twin boys, one born "black," the other born "white." As in, one has dark skin, the other has light skin. As in, one parent is black (with some European heritage), the other is white. As in BIRACIAL.

I didn't think I'd be soap boxing it up today, but it seems I'm going to have to. First off, black people come in all different shades, from deep deep dark chocolate to light cream. People need to realize that it's not the skin tone that makes the race, it's the-- well, to put it bluntly-- the RACE. That's why a black person with albinism is still considered black even though they have light skin. The fact that you can call two biracial kids black or white just because they have two different skin colors, even though they come from the same two parents, is wrong.

You know who else is biracial? Rashida Jones.

If no one ever told you she was half black, would you have ever guessed it? That's what I'm saying, people!

I'm Jamaican American, so I have some European back there somewhere, but I'm still mostly black. I have caramel skin, and sometimes people think I'm Filipino or Hispanic (but then again, when immigrants like you, they automatically lump you in with themselves). My younger sister and older brother have darker complexions, but we were born from the same exact parents. My skin is not as light as the kid's in the article, but my nana's definitely was. Actually, people used to think she was white.

I wish I could share pictures for proof, but I'm not sure if my family is ok with their faces all over the internet. (maybe later I'll get approval and post some). Ok, fine, I'll at least post one of myself, even though I said I wouldn't do it until I got an agent *freaks out for a second*

Me at the Celtic festival.

*dies of embarrassment*

Just to remind you, I am in fact black. I'm also a twin. Our skin is the same, but our hair textures are different-- we can't always use the same kind of shampoos or go through the same process of styling it. Twins are separate people. That's why you can end up with a boy and girl who are twins.

So let's stop with the ignorance, people, and creating a freak show out of twin brothers just because their skin tones are different.

*pauses for slow clap*

*steps gracefully off soapbox*

*trips at last second*

Oh wait, I said "THINGS that make me vomit."

Bat paste

This would definitely have to do it.

Happy October!

2011-10-01T09:32:00.000-07:00

Tis a new month, friends! For a second there I was thinking the worst, but we made it out of September alive!

Update time!!!!

Let's get the bad news out of the way first, I suppose... I'm car-less. I mean, I've been for a while, but now I seriously need one and there's really no way I could afford it right now. I work outside of town, and travel is getting more and more difficult, not to mention expensive and tiring. I need a car by the end of the month, or at least by mid November, otherwise I don't know what I'm going to do... Didn't know an empress could struggle with finances, did you? If you feel sorry for me I'd appreciate if you bought my book (link to the right) to contribute to my car fund. Or if you wanna, like, send a check for $1000 that'll work too.

Anyway, on to the fun stuff! I was gone for a week and a half (did I tell you guys that? I don't think I told you guys that. How annoyingly empress-like of me to just pick up and leave unannounced). I went to see my bf's family, and then there was a Celtic Festival in PA, complete with kilts, accents, fiddling, and haggis.

The band Comas.

The band Amarach (one of my faves!)

Horsies with hats.

Kilts!!!

Also, there's only one day left to enter the giveaway to win THE (SPARKLY) VAMPIRE (-OBSESSED) DIARIES!!! Who doesn't like free books?

And the final news of today... Monopoly is back at McDonalds. Go win me some munnies, please :3

Has everyone already seen this?

2011-09-13T11:34:00.000-07:00

Apparently Amazon is going e-book crazy and is going to be offering e-books for rent. Do we all really need another fool-proof way to go blind?-- we spend enough time in front of our screens in the first place, but with unlimited books to read it's bound to make the situation worse. Besides, there's already a free version that Amazon will have to contend with: the public library. Sure, all the books have been touched by other people, but they're FREE and you can get a bunch of anti-bacterial from Bath and Body Works for like five bucks.

Also, I'm gonna be going out of town this friday, and I'll be gone all next week. That does not give you permission to party like a rock star without me! (Although, to be honest, I'm definitely gonna be partying while I'm gone.)

Holler at yo' girl!

2011-09-08T01:53:00.000-07:00

Sooooo... my book is published. Like, to the world. Just thought I should put that out there.

Please buy if you love me, or if you hate me but love funny books, or if you hate funny books but just love cute covers, or if you hate cute covers but just love me. It's a cycle you can't get out of. Don't try.
(Link to purchase is in the side bar)

Or, if you're broke like me and just want to support you can do so in a few ways:

1) Tweet this: Don't forget to get yourself a copy of THE (SPARKLY) VAMPIRE (-OBSESSED) DIARIES! RT 4 MAX Awesomeness (pretty please) https://www.createspace.com/3676933

2) Facebook Status it up! Blog about it! Tell somebody! Tell lots of somebody's!

3) Be my shoulder to cry on for when I get stressed out.

Also, I know I've said this before but... The Hunger Games review is coming soon. Not that you care anymore, I'm just letting you know I haven't forgotten.

Cover reveal!

2011-08-26T08:52:00.000-07:00

Here be da paperback! Front, spine, and back.

Ain't it purdy? Not quite available yet, but I'll be getting my own proof next week, and after I have an expensive and superfluous photoshoot with it, you'll get to buy your own copy too! I'll also be having a contest soon (next week?) to give away a free copy so stay tuned for that!

Hurricane, hurricane, go away!

2011-08-25T10:40:00.000-07:00

Hurricane's a comin'! Authorities have already evacuated tourists, and newscasters are telling locals to have bags packed just in case.

*insanely ginormous eye-roll* Ahh, my eyes! *frantic effort to stop them from rolling out of sockets*

I'm not too worried, not about myself anyway. But I am sort of hoping it dies down so at least we won't have to evacuate. Maybe it's just laziness talking, but I really don't feel like going anywhere. Plus, I'd rather my job not be closed-- I need the munnies! Stupid Irene, messing with the goal of buying a car *shakes fist at sky*

In other news, the paperback version of The (Sparkly) Vampire (-Obessed) Diaries should be out by next week, and as long as the power doesn't go out this weekend I'm going to make it available in more digital forms. And then there'll be contests and blog tours and all sorts of fun. Yay!

I'M PUBLISHED!

2011-08-22T08:45:00.000-07:00

Well, self published. I just published my first e-book on Amazon! It's $0.99 so I'd love if you guys could check it out.

Looky, looky at my booky!

There's also a paperback version coming soon, so if you don't have a Kindle never fear!

Now THIS is a book cover

2011-07-16T19:12:00.000-07:00

That is all.

It's my party and I brag if I want to

2011-07-01T07:29:00.000-07:00

So in case you didn't know it yet, this weekend is not only full of Fourth of July sales but also chock full of MY BIRTHDAY! Yes, tis my birthday weekend, people. With my elven beauty and lifespan, you'd think that I wouldn't bother with this sort of thing-- but what woman could ever resist a spa day?!?!?

Also, I found the cutest skirt for $17... originally $50! Yes, this weekend could not get any better (Unless I got an offer of representation or met Adam Levine on the street and he asked me out to dinner or if someone gave me a brand new car.)

Ok, guys, I gotta get all cute for my spa date. See you next week sometime maybe after wednesday or not or before who knows I'm gonna shut up now k bye!

I am such a poopie head

2011-06-17T10:13:00.000-07:00

I know I promised you guys a review, like, years ago, but stuff has come up. I just found out that I'm pregnant, I'm running way behind on my car payment, and the only good job I could get is across the country so now I have to find some way to move.

Actually, that's all a tub of lies, but you would have never accepted "I was just enjoying my summer," as a viable excuse.

That's not true either. I'm having a very uneventful summer.

So what's my excuse for not posting the review?... I am a poopie head. There. I said it. But I will post it, and it will be wonderfully awesome, so don't worry.

On an unrelated note, I had a dream last night that I was playing Jack Sparrow in a play--which was weird because there were plenty of guys there who could have played him, I don't know why they didn't let me play a girl.

Ok, guys, see you later!

2011-05-29T09:03:00.000-07:00

Just finished The Hunger Games. Review coming soon!

Contest insanity!!!

2011-05-27T11:36:00.000-07:00

Ok, there are two awesome contests for all you writers out there, and also one for the readers, too.

1) Brian Farrey's contest of awesome, in which the winner receives either a manuscript critque or (for the non-writers out there who want to enter) a chocolate-covered boat load of books! You do need a Twitter account to enter the contest, but there's really no work involved, and we all know those are my favorite kinds of contests :3 It's also good to note that Brian is the acquiring editor at Flux. FLUX. I capitalized for emphasis and everything. Networking is always important.

AAAAAND

2) Author Shelley Watters is having an agent contest on her blog with brand new agent Judith Engracia! May 31st is the deadline sooooo... enter, unless you're clinically insane and don't understand that this contest is giving you access to a brand new agent and she's going to look at your work and YOU COULD GET AN AGENT.

Hungry for some Games!

2011-05-18T14:43:00.000-07:00

On a whim I bought myself a copy of The Hunger Games. I've always wanted to read it, but I don't like cold purchases of books-- I like getting them from the library first, and then if I love it I buy it. But I had a giftcard so I figured what the hey? Plus I just got this awesome book light for my graduation party so I needed a new book to go with it.

Anyhoo, I've read about nine chapters so far and I am loving it! Although... I came across two predictable plot turns. I guess every book has those, but the fact that I was rolling my eyes at them and calling them before they happened was mildly annoying.

But that's two out of a million! It's still an amazing book!

I'm trying to stretch out the enjoyment for a while, so I'm pacing myself with the reading. But afterwards it's review time!

Heck YES! (In the style of a vlogbrothers video)

2011-04-29T08:30:00.000-07:00

Goodmorning Stalkers! This post comes to you in three wonderfully awesome parts.

Part 1-- I'm graduated. Well, sort of. Today was my very last day of undergrad, and graduation is in two weeks. I am so overjoyed right now, you don't even know! Now I can be a real adult and look for a job and pay bills and buy a car and pay more bills and hope I make enough money before my college loans jump me in the alley in six months.

Part 2-- I gots me a blog award! YAY! My very first, but hopefully not my last. Deirdra gave it to me, go give her some love and maybe you can get one too. Probably not, but one can hope.

Part 3-- Still no luck on the agent front, but now that school is out I can focus on my writing a lot more. I know my writing is good, it's just a matter of the right story. Who knows, maybe I'll have something to announce this summer... like a seven figure book deal. Yeah, that's right, I said it. You can go run and tell that, homeboy!

Anyhoos, don't forget to be awesome (like me), enjoy this cute cat, and, Stalkers, I will see you on Monday.*

*Unless something comes up and I wanna blog tomorrow... then I guess you'll see me tomorrow.

Awesome Agent Contest!

2011-04-19T18:29:00.000-07:00

Ok, tell me why there are only, like, 100 entries in this contest to pitch your novel to Lit Agent Natalie Fischer? Seriously? She's not accepting queries right now, and you didn't enter yet? You peoples is crazy. Get your booties over there and enter!

I'm back!... Sorta

2011-04-19T13:56:00.000-07:00

Dude, I haven't blogged in forever, and yet people still insist on stalking me.

Welcome Indie, Beckah, Ryann, Kalen, A.W., pk, Perri, K.C., and of course my BFF's Sirra, Bethany, and Leigh! Did I miss anyone? Feel free to yell at me, just don't be a jerk about it. Jerks make my tummy growl, and when my tummy growls I have to eat something-- don't let it be you!

So, now that we've established that I'm the most awesome, cannibalistic empress around, please help yourself to the taco bar :3

Anyway, as for being absent, I do have a legit excuse: There are now only two weeks left of school. YAY! So I pretty much have to work all the time, which totally sucks. Luckily, by the end of the work, I will have a BA to show for it, so YAY again! And then I'll have to look for a job... Yeah... Maybe I should just start charging taxes. Empresses are allowed to do that, right?

Last bit of news: I'm thinking of doing a contest or something after school gets out. Any cool ideas? What do you guys want to do?

Kissing assaults suck!

2011-03-21T13:23:00.000-07:00

Stacia Kane just posted on her blog about "sexy" things in books that just aren't that sexy in real life, so I thought I'd weigh in too.

This isn't exactly sexy, but you know what I don't get? (rhetorical question! Good thing this ain't a query letter) When a guy and girl aren't even an official couple and the guy just kisses the girl randomly, and the girl doesn't even stop him even if she doesn't think it's ok. Unless the girl drops hints to let you know it's acceptable, guys, it's not. Also, you should know that lots of girls have some sort of weapon on them in their purse, and you may not want to surprise them with that sort of molestation or it could get real ugly sooner than you think.

One time one of my guy friends confessed his love for me, and then he just grabbed me and was about to kiss me like it was some sort of romance novel or something. Fortunately, I was holding a can of soda at the time, so I shook it and sprayed it in his face. And you know what, he never tried it again. Booyah.

Yeah. I just made that story up.

Anyway, when it happens in a book (even in my own) I sort of squirm and shake my hands violently, as if to rid myself of vicious, flesh-eating creepiness. So, guys, if you want to make sure my adorable royal self never has to react this way, please find some way to make sure the girl likes you and wants to be kissed before you plant one on her. Otherwise, I've got a soda and I'm not afraid to use it.

Attention all writers!

2011-03-18T11:21:00.001-07:00

There is the coolest contest going on over at YAtopia! Wanna get your work read by agent of awesome Ammi-Joan Paquette? The what are you waiting for, get over there now!

Japan needs YOU!

2011-03-11T08:09:00.000-08:00

I'm sure you all heard about the earthquake in Japan (you haven't? Well, stop reading this blog and go watch the news! Pronto! And then come back, because I like having you around :3 ) Please keep all those involved in your prayers and find something you can do to help or support, even in the smallest way.

Maureen Johnson has this awesome donation giveaway going on. Details are here.

Also, the Red Cross could always use donations.

Or if you don't have any money to spare, help spread awareness. Tweet, text, blog, call somebody. Every little bit helps.

2011-03-01T14:59:00.000-08:00

I'm writing a 10 pg paper on world music. Specifically, Taiko drumming. If anyone would like to write this for me, please email immediately.

2011-02-23T16:15:00.000-08:00

Oh my gosh! Are you serious? The new spring Oreos are yellow! What the heck!?!? I want the blue ones back!

In other news, I just found a Scriabin prelude online that I can print out for free! Definitely taking that to a practice room, on the realz!

This has just been a pointless post. Thank you.

Proud to be a bonfide murderer

2011-02-22T03:52:00.000-08:00

Writers are the only people on the planet who can commit heinous crimes and not be put away for life. We're just cool like that. In fact, I just decimated an entire community, and I feel great! It was executed beautifully, and I looked fierce doing it which is always important. I was gonna wear my pink pumps, but went with the black ankle boots because they're easier to clean. Nothing like a genocide to start off the day, am I right?

Ok, now that I've established that I'm completely psycho, what about you guys? What crimes have you committed lately? (and if you tell me ones unrelated to writing I shall call cops. Please. I do not want to hear about your personal issues, ok? *goin' all ghetto on ya!*)

I'm so stalker-licious!

2011-02-19T20:46:00.000-08:00

Apparently.

I've got 50 stalkers! Yay! I wanna do a blog contest, but I've got nothing to give away... except maybe invisible food. But I give that away all the time.

Must think of things to give to ~~poor, unfortunate souls~~ ~~unsuspecting victims~~ loverly people. Suggestions?

I know her! I know her!!!

2011-02-15T20:28:00.000-08:00

My friend is on this book cover! Read it just because of that fact.

It's Valentine's Day!

2011-02-14T10:50:00.000-08:00

So, I figured I'd leave you with some lovey dovey pictures to get you in the Valentine mood!

Who's the hottest?

2011-02-09T07:59:00.000-08:00

Oh my gosh, the blog's working again! Thank you God! That was getting a little scary for a second... didn't think I would ever blog again. *wipes tears on someone else's expensive silk dress*

Anyway, today I'm talking about literary hotties. My literary hotties. Cuz I've got tons!(Well, not really, realistically speaking). I don't really wanna mention supernatural beings, cuz they're always gonna be hotter and that's not really fair to the humans.

So the challenge is, pick ONE hottie from each of your projects and describe (in ONE sentence) what makes them hot. Feel free to post it on your blog as a challenge instead of in comments (but please, link back to me so everyone knows where the challenge originated.)

Chronicles of a Demonsbane-- Val
Shy as heck, but when it comes down to it he does what he has to do to take care of the ones he loves.

Lunatic, My Love-- Paul
Sexy, sexy, sexy, and stands by his woman even though she's a pain in the butt!

Untitled love story-- Birkenstock
Huge jerk, awesome one-liners, and he's Korean (need I say more?)

Phoenix-- Phoenix!
He's a bit lost in the world, since he was just recently brought back to life, but he has an admirable amount of persistence and will.

Burn-- Ben
Being disfigured in a fire didn't dampen his spirit and charm, making him one of the most romantic men I've ever written.

So what about you? Who are your top hotties?

Blogger won't let me write posts! Son of a Preacher man!

2011-02-01T09:55:00.000-08:00

This has got to be...

2011-01-28T09:38:00.000-08:00

the coolest cover I've ever seen! Unfortunately, it's not mine.

Hank Green, in case you're wondering

2011-01-22T19:22:00.000-08:00

According to Google, you are not Hogwarts. I repeat, NOT. Sorry to disappoint you.

According to Bing, you are cute. That's good to know.

But I am nothing, apparently. I mean, besides awesome. That must be amended.

I'm's on Twitter now!

2011-01-22T10:14:00.000-08:00

Now you can follow and obey me in two places

http://twitter.com/#!/EmpressAwesome

2011-01-21T22:00:00.000-08:00

Have you even done something that you thought was so awesome, and everyone else was telling you it was awesome, and then this one person says it's totally not... and suddenly it doesn't feel quite so awesome anymore?

Yeah, me neither.

And now, an unrelated picture. Because I can.

2011-01-17T09:47:00.000-08:00

It's Martin Luther King Jr Day. And I'm black. Which means that everyone is obligated to show their appreciation in a monetary fashion. Once I figure out how to get the donation button working we can get that done.

Ballroom dancing and cello

2011-01-15T07:11:00.000-08:00

Two of the most beautiful things in the world

The swift ARC of rejection

2011-01-13T17:09:00.000-08:00

It took three hours to get my internet working only to check my email and discover that I had FOUR REJECTIONS waiting for me. All sent within a seven hour time span. It's a good thing I'm pretty.

In other news, time to tell about da ARC! Remember when I said I was waiting on a certain book and that I couldn't wait to buy it? Well now I don't have to because I got it five months early! Joy! Rapture! Ecstasy (-- ok, cool it, Empress, it's just a book.)

D sharp, C, F SHAAARRRRRP!

Introducing Wither! Not due out until March. The publisher just sent it to me... can't remember whether I entered a blog contest or what, but I want to thank whomever is responsible for this. You are officially my best friend.

Now I don't wanna give anything away for those of you who are planning to read it (though, actually, if you want spoilers I'll be posting reviews on Goodreads and Amazon pretty soon) but I'll just say that it wasn't what I expected. You may now ponder upon my words.

2011-01-11T15:12:00.000-08:00

Wow, I've been gone for over a month! There's a perfectly good explanation for that, and if you'll excuse me for a moment I'll go think it up.

--5 mins and 7 tacos later--

It was Christmas for crying out loud! Heartless monsters!

Actually, I was working two jobs almost everyday, had four christmas celebrations, and then went away for New Years... and now school just started up. So that's why.

When I get around to it, I gotta tell you all about the ARC I received in the mail.

Anyhoos, gots to go. Gotta go buy a Walmart out of all their winter oreos.

It's wednesday!!!

2010-12-01T13:14:00.000-08:00

It's also December 1st.

Yep. Just making sure you knew.

2010-11-30T13:52:00.000-08:00

Ok, so remember when I started posting that weird story, sort of my writing exercise? Yeah... gonna start that up again. It's really just for fun, so don't start critiquing and taking it too seriously.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

He was a bit of a train wreck. Sweatpants and a greasy t-shirt, long black hair going this way and that, a black spray painted backpack with a faulty zipper. It was a wonder he got to the corner bus stop without getting “Hobo!” yelled at him. And he walked strangely, with a clumsy sort of swagger. But those weren’t the details Celia noticed. Everything about him escaped her knowledge but his eyes.

They were a shade of brownish red. Perhaps mahogany. Deep, dark, dense, mysterious. Like a forest. And they looked liquid, like they would bleed out of his eye sockets at any moment. It was a strange combination that made everything about his eye region extremely creepy and nightmare inducing. But also alluring, in a way. If you liked eyes that reminded you of tree bark and blood and some sort of gross excrement. How she saw them so clearly in the dark never occurred to her.

He looked at her briefly and smiled, and the street light above them made his teeth shine. There was nothing particularly beautiful about his face, although there was something a bit sinister and creepy, and Celia was glad when a woman with a bicycle and a duffle bag showed up to wait for the midnight bus with them. Neither she nor the young man questioned what she was doing riding a bike so late at night. One of her eyes looked dark and it may or may not have been because of the night shadows. From the way she fingered her face, Celia guessed that it wasn’t.

The midnight bus arrived, and the young man let the ladies board first. Long bangs fell into his face and blocked Celia’s view of his eyes. She snuck a look at him as he let her pass. She wanted to see those eyes. But perhaps it was too long of a look, because he noticed and laughed. She turned away embarrassed, and hurried up the steps, while he followed casually behind, toting the woman’s bike.

There was no bus driver. At night all the public transportation ran on computers. Robots in disguise. But tonight, a bus driver would have been ideal. Preferably one with a gun and the number to a good therapist.

The young man brought the bike to the back of the bus, where the woman sat. She hastily dried her eyes on her shirt and thanked him. But soon they were sharing a laugh, and he was sitting down beside her. Celia sat in the front of the bus, refusing to look back. She was jealous and uncomfortable at the same time. Why didn’t he want to look at her with those disgusting eyes? No, it was better that he didn’t. It was better that she just ignore his existence and get home.

Maybe she should have just called her uncle to pick her up and accepted her punishment, instead of trying to hide the fact that she should have never went to the party in the first place. He told her not to go because he knew there would be drinking. She knew that too, but she didn’t care. Until her childhood friend stood on the kitchen counter and started peeing in some girl’s hair. Then she cared. But not enough to call her uncle. That would only get her locked in the meat freezer for the next week. Right then and there she promised God that she would never go to a college party again, so long as her uncle didn’t have to find out.

She snuck a look behind her. They were whispering now and sitting very close, with his arm around her shoulder, and she was blushing. Celia turned forward quickly, as if she had just witnessed the holocaust. He’s half your age! she thought, and he smells like motor oil. And he’s…

She heard a groan and peeked behind again, and watched with a red face as the woman leaned against the window, the young man’s mouth against her neck. The thought of getting off at the next stop and walking seemed like a great idea, although being out at night alone was a lot more dangerous than what was in the bus. She told herself that, but she didn’t believe it. She just sat huddled on her seat facing forward, trying to block out the world. And as the bus halted abruptly and she looked up, she really didn’t believe it.

The young man was standing beside her, and in the too-bright interrogation lights of the bus she saw him lick a red liquid from his lips. He smiled at her, his teeth laced with that same liquid and then he spoke, a voice that seemed too deep and inviting to belong to such an average sized person. “You should probably stick to daytime busses, sweetheart. Here there be monsters.”

Did people really say that? The allure Celia had held for his eyes not ten minutes ago was replaced by panic as she stared at her lap and listened to him descend and exit the bus. The hiss of the closing door relieved a bit of her fear, which was only rekindled again by the thought of the woman at the back of the bus. She thought about going to check on her, but couldn’t bring herself to get up. She had a weak stomach. Maybe if she ignored it she could pass it off as a dream. Doubtful, but it was the only hope she had.

She prayed through every single long minute that went by until her stop finally arrived, and then she bolted off of the bus. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. She cried anyway. She cried all the way up to her room and buried herself under the covers with her chibi anime plushy collection.

In fact, she was crying so hard that when her uncle entered the room to inform her that he was sick of taking care of her and had called the collection police and they were on their way to come take her to Exile, she barely caught the first word.

“Textile?”

“Exile,” her uncle repeated.

“Oh.”

He left her alone to her crying, until some sort of epiphany shocked her out of it.

“I thought vampires were supposed to be beautiful,” said Celia, and then slipped into a fitful sleep.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In other news, I totally failed at NaNo. Yay! But at least I got some writing done, even if it wasn't 50,000.

It's Phanksgiving!!!

2010-11-22T09:22:00.000-08:00

And I'm so phankful for you guys reading this blog! Who knew strangers would wanna hear what I have to say? Just goes to show... I'm called Empress Awesome for a reason.

Anyways, I'm phankful for a whole lot of things, including my super sexy boyfriend (whom I've been with for a year. Happy anniversary, baby!), fingers that work well so I can type and play violin (and also count the money which I make by playing), and, like, oxygen ('cause that's always good). I'm also phankful to be living in a country where you can freely switch out a TH combo and make it PH without being judged, because you're just too awesome to do things the way commoners do.

Wait a second, stop looking at me like that. This is MY kingdom, I can do what I want!

Uhhh... *puts oversized fly swatter away*

So tell me, what are you phankful for? And don't say tacos, 'cause I already claimed that one, like, infinity times.

No title, cuz titles are so cliche

2010-11-14T18:42:00.000-08:00

I am so failing at NaNo. You go into it thinking it's all nice and fun, that it's free and you have nothing to lose, but then you realize you have plenty to lose in this sinister game: your sanity. Mine's been gone for quite some time, but that's beside the point.

Anyway, it's about time for my monthly viewing of The Other Boleyn Girl.

Laters

NaNo is underway!

2010-11-02T15:48:00.000-07:00

Just thought I'd let you know :3

I'm gonna try to crank out 2,000 words a day, that way I'll have a 60,000 word novel by the end instead of 50,000.

That is all.

Gotta write. Laters.

Almost here...

2010-10-29T20:04:00.000-07:00

I slept all day today. Preparing for NaNo, where I won't have time to sleep at all. I don't know if human bodies can conserve enough energy for a month just by sleeping for 24 hours, but I'm will to give it a shot.

If not, there's always halloween candy.

And so it begins...

2010-10-25T12:21:00.000-07:00

Well, not exactly.

Just signed up for NaNo! Super stoked! My username is...

Fays_Angel

Awesome, no? Yes. That's what I thought.

Feel free to add me as your NaNo buddy, and I'll add you-- that way we'll have plenty of shoulders to cry on.

NaNoWriMo!!!... again :)

2010-10-22T09:36:00.000-07:00

Oh my gosh, November is right around the corner! That means it's time to get ready for National Novel Writing Month (or NaNoWriMo for all the cool people out there). I'm thinking that I should finish a novel I've already started instead of figuring out a new one... or maybe finish two novels!... or, even better, start book two of Demonsbane (I've got like 7000 words, but those are pretty much just notes)

Leaning towards book two. What are you guys planning?

So, now I'm gonna be working two jobs (maybe three), going to school, getting ready for the holidays, AND doing NaNoWriMo. Oy, what a life I'm living.

And ps, sorry I was gone so long, but that's what happens when you take awesome vacations that involve socializing with actual human beings -- the time flies and you find that the internet is not necessary. Although, some would call that a nightmare.

2010-10-14T19:23:00.000-07:00

Don't you hate it when you run out of things to talk about because life feels so normal? Yeah, me too.

So to compensate...

BABY OTTER POWER!!!!

Singing is writing, just as writing is singing

2010-10-04T03:53:00.000-07:00

I wish I could sing well. I totally suck at it (even though my parents would disagree) But the singing gene totally avoided me when I was conceived, just like I avoid certain people in the hallway when I know they want to talk to me. But I avoid them because they're fake and want to pretend that they like me because I'm cool like that. The singing gene avoided me because it's evil!

And I just said "avoid" way too much. And "like." And all my sentences begin with conjunctions. (What did I wanna do for a living, again? Be a published writer? Well, seeing as there's plenty of bad writers out there, the industry may as well accept my poor sentence structure. It's only fair.)

Anyway, the singing gene may have shunned me, but the music gene didn't. And when you think about it, you don't really need your own voice to sing if you can make an instrument do it for you. I've been having an off and on relationship with my violin for the past fourteen years, and I'm awesome at it.

My point?

There's not only one way to sing... just as there's not only one way to tell a great story. Take an established tune (Cinderella) find your instrument (zombie mer-freaks from the Dead Sea) and sing your little heart out. You may be surprised by the result.

Busy, busy bumblebee

2010-10-01T09:25:00.000-07:00

I've been busy.

(No not having babies you sicko other stuff geewiz why you gotta do me like that?)

I just got a new job. I'll soon have two jobs. I may even have three before the month is out, plus school. Of course, I'll have to write everyday and make time for friends and family. And then with the holiday season upon us... well, you get my drift. Hopefully I'll still be able to update the old blog, but it may just be a Mon-Wed-Fri thing instead of whenever (which means it'll probably be updated more often, if you think about it)

Anyways, just giving you all a heads up.

Author Interview: Cat Clarke

2010-09-28T01:52:00.000-07:00

And now, as I promised (twice) author interview with Cat Clarke, whose debut novel Entangled come out Jan 2011.

1) How did you get into writing, anyway?

I’ve known for a long time that I wanted to be a writer. It was just a very long time before I actually sat down to write ENTANGLED. Then the book took a long (really long!) time to write and I nearly gave up lots of times. I’m glad I didn’t!

2) In one sentence tell me about Entangled.

It’s the story of a girl called Grace and the events that lead to her making a very drastic decision. Please can I cheat and add the sentence my publisher came up with? ‘A story of dark secrets, intense friendship and electrifying attraction.’ I'm sure you'll agree that this sentence is way better than mine!

3) What's a typical day look like for you? I mean, do you live like a mortal or does your god-like author status change everything?

God-like author status? Maybe one day! (*sighs wistfully*) At the moment there’s no typical day for me, as I’m just making the transition from my full-time day job as a senior commissioning editor of children’s non-fiction books to my new life as a writer/freelance editor/children’s literary consultant. Right now there’s a lot of emailing, tweeting and not a whole lot of writing being done. This question has made me realize I really need to get into a routine pronto, so THANK YOU!

4) Let's talk about agents: how did you end up with yours?

Months before I’d finished ENTANGLED my best friend told me that she’d just met the agent for me. I thought this was a rather unhelpful thing to say, since the chances of one particular agent wanting me as a client were slim to none. Still, I queried a handful of agents, and luckily enough My Dream Agent (a.k.a. Marvellous Victoria) was interested in me and my book! I must admit I found the waiting excruciating though.

5) If you could be a dessert (guarded by the king's men, so there's no threat of being eaten) which one would you be?

Hmm... tricky. I’m much more of a savoury person, so I’d rather be a cheese. But if I HAD to be a dessert, I’d be a hot chocolate brownie, with a scoop of the finest vanilla ice cream on top. The ice cream would have to be a never-ever-melts sort of ice cream.

6) Any advice for the aspiring writers out there?

Make time to write – as often as you possibly can. This is harder than it sounds (well, it is for me, anyway!). You don’t have to write thousands and thousands of words a day. Little and often works just as well. Also, you should read as much as you can – everything you can get your hands on. You’ll learn just as much from the so-called ‘trashy’ stuff, as you will from the greats.

7) And I gotta know: paper or plastic?

PAPER! Especially when it comes to books. (But if we’re talking money, I prefer paying with plastic. Everyone knows that paying by card doesn’t count as real spending... right?)

Check out Cat's website www.catclarke.com, or visit her Twitter or Blog and join in on the Cat-tastic fun!

Oh my gosh, look what just came in

2010-09-27T01:37:00.000-07:00

The UK cover! Don't you just love it?

I think I like it a bit more than the American one. It has a different, and yet so accurate, personality. Both are black and white with red print, which is as it should be. Both show different sides of Fay. What do you think? Here's the American one, in case you forgot:

Ok, stop freaking out. I know I promised an author interview today, but you'll get it tomorrow. No need to get crazy.

Submission update

2010-09-24T14:23:00.000-07:00

Feminists, don't go getting crazy. I'm talking about query letters.

Queries-- 84

Partial requests-- 1

Full requests-- 5

Rejections-- 77

Waiting on response-- 8

I didn't appreciate my latest rejection-- it had a snooty air about it. Just because you're one of the top agencies, doesn't give you the right to be a snob. You can brag about your riches, but don't diss the people who gave them to you. You do get paid on commission, you know.

Oh well, I don't think I want a snooty agent anyway.

Waiting on seven queries makes me happy, because seven is God's perfect number. One of them is bound to be perfect for me!

EDIT: Correction, waiting on eight queries. But the number eight signifies a new beginning, so that sounds pretty good too :3

Overture to a drippy, droppy mess of a delicious Belgian Waffle

2010-09-23T12:16:00.000-07:00

Whoa, I've missed a lot of blogging days, which is totally weird for me (actually it's not... so nevermind). I didn't even bother to name this post anything that has anything to do with what I'm talking about. Nothing new on the home front to report except that my beautiful boyfriend is twice as beautiful as yours *brag brag brag* ( not new, but still). And I'm waiting on a phone call that could change my entire life.

That's right. The agent phone call.

I imagine it's not anything like Abercombie and Fitch calling to say, "Yay! You can work this awesome part-time job in which you get to wear flip flops everyday and spray clothes with wonderful fragrance," which in itself is a pretty sweet gig. I imagine it's more like, "OMG*, you get to do what you've always dreamed of doing, writing awesome books you wanna write and getting paid for it, plus fame and glory (optional) and awesome gift baskets!"

And yeah, that one gets an exclamation point, because it's just that good.

Ok, so tomorrow or monday there'll be an author interview with the loverly Cat Clarke, so stay tooned for that.

AAAAND Question of the Day: What do you think it says about a person when they like tritones and major thirds? The Devils Music and pure harmony? Does that make you a genius or a psycho? (And no I'm not asking to prove anything to myself what are you trying to say that I'm psycho it's not about me at all mind your own business GOSH!)

*and we all know how much I hate that.

5 Ways of knowing you should become a vampire*

2010-09-20T01:35:00.000-07:00

I. You want more than anything to be bitten, have all the blood drained out of you, and be turned into a walking corpse.

II. You are not a fan of delicious flavor.

III. Your ideal bedroom is ten times smaller than a struggling musician's studio apartment.

IV. You love dust.

V. You have hundreds of years worth of activities planned.

*If this list applies to you,watch out for Wyatt the Vampire Hunter. Also, see Book Freaks

Book Trailer!!!

2010-09-16T23:02:00.000-07:00

I'm going to be making a couple of book trailers for Demonsbane: one serious, one romantic, one funny. Gotta appeal to all audiences. Anyway, I got the funny one done!

You guys may not think it's funny, but oh well! I had a lot of fun making it.

It would be awesome if you guys could share this with your friends :3

How to write a synopsis

2010-09-16T01:09:00.000-07:00

For those of you who found the query process helpful, you may want to keep reading. I'm going to let you in on the little secret of how to write a fool proof synopsis for that agent/publisher you've been eying (the fact that I've never written one is irrelevant.)

1) Eat some chocolate. You're gonna need it.

2) Finish your novel, or at least outline your chapters. The chapters will be your guidelines, so if your chapters suck fuggedaboutit.

3) Repeat step one.

4) Take a look at your chapters and take note of the important events that happen in each one. And there'd better be an important event in each one otherwise you've just written a pointless chapter. Hurray! Time to rewrite.

5) Repeat step one, especially if you had to rewrite. Maybe add some cake into the mix.

6) Use those events as pivot points as you construct the loverly prose that will turn your synopsis into a synopsis (as opposed to an outline)

7) Go watch Gossip Girl and/or buy yourself some sexy red heels. You deserve something nice before the rejections start flooding in.

And there you have it!

Waiting on Wednesday

2010-09-15T01:39:00.000-07:00

Ripple by Mandy Hubbard

To be released July2011

Goodreads synopsis: Eighteen year old Lexi Wentworth is cursed. For as long as she can remember, she’s spent every night swimming. If she doesn’t, she’ll regret it—simply walking will be agony, as if she’s stepping on shattered glass. Her body craves the water, demands the water, until she can’t say no.

But it's not the swimming that troubles Lexi. It’s the singing that goes with it.When she turned sixteen, her siren song killed the only boy she's ever loved. Now, she avoids the popular shores of the Pacific in favor of a long forgotten lake up in the mountains, where she can swim and sing in peace, far from the population of her oceanside home.

Until, that is, Cole Mills discovers her lake. He’s new to Lincoln City High, and he doesn’t know about Lexi’s reputation as an ice queen—a reputation she’s carefully cultivated to keep everyone around her safe. He pushes her, talks to her, forces her to dream of what life could be like if she weren’t a siren.

Lexi can’t stop herself from warming to him, from falling for him. Soon, he’s demanding answers, following her to the lake, unknowingly risking his life. How can she keep him safe when the one thing she wants most--to hold him close-- will endanger his life?
Ok. A. MA. ZING. This sounds soooooo good! And the cover's preeeetty. I gots to read this, fo sho!

The results are in...

2010-09-13T01:23:00.000-07:00

Stats on Chronicles of a Demonsbane

Queries-- 84
Partial requests-- 1
Full requests-- 4
Rejections-- 76
Waiting on response-- 8

Wow. Those stats suck! I was sure I had more requests than that, but I guess not. Whatevs. It is my first novel, afterall. The next one will have much better results... and it'll be easier to post because I'll make a spreadsheet of submissions instead of counting emails. Haha!

The Soul Gauge

2010-09-11T01:50:00.000-07:00

I have an exam on tuesday, so no long posts until next week. But I will leave you with something wonderfully awesome and downright adorable.

It's true

For those of you who don't know...

2010-09-10T08:16:00.000-07:00

I'm awesome, it's hard out there for a pimp, and writing is a lot of work.

Because I can and I must

2010-09-09T02:06:00.000-07:00

Someone should give this girl an award for best story EVER!

Money is useless!

2010-09-08T08:10:00.000-07:00

Unless you're on a shopping spree... or at Cheesecake Factory... or Taco Bell... or if an amazing book just came out and you MUST have it... or, you know, if you wanna keep your house.

But seriously, John Green can convince you a lot better than I can, with facts and flailing arms and everything. Listen up, people!

Something awesome for friday!

2010-09-03T01:35:00.000-07:00

I'm on my way to NY to attend something that's none of your business (AKA, a wedding) so I figured I would leave you with something wonderfully awesome for the weekend. This is an picture that my really good friend drew for me based on my book. Yay! It was done all in marker... can you believe it? I never knew there were people who could control the acts of markers until I met Hannah.

If you wanna know who these people are, you'd better pray I get published! Or, you know, read the description when you follow the link.

She's an awesome artist. Check her out at beautiful, awesome friend who draws like a dream and see how you can get some really inexpensive commissions.Or become a fan of her's here Facebook madness!!!

Author Interview: Kirsty Eagar

2010-09-02T02:57:00.000-07:00

Haven't done one of these in a while... author interview! Holler!

Today we have the loverly Kirsty Eagar, author of Raw Blue and the upcoming Saltwater Vampires.

1. What got you into writing?

Three things happened at around the same time: 1. I quit my job, which meant there was head space available; 2. I read Stephen King's On Writing; 3. I read Raymond Chandler's The Big Sleep, which got me thinking about style.

2. Tell me about your latest novel

Saltwater Vampires is set in an Australian coastal town called Rocky Head. The main character, Jamie, and his former friend Dale, nearly died in a boating accident, four months earlier. Jamie managed to save himself, but Dale was left horrifically injured and can't surf any more. Everybody in town judges Jamie, which isn't really fair because no one knows what happened out there - Jamie and Dale never talk about it, and they don't talk to each other any more either.

Anyway, the whole incident has had a huge impact on Jamie. He's driven, impatient, and does not want to waste life. For him, summer holidays represent a chance to put the accident behind him and focus on surfing, making money and going to the local music festival. But when he's savagely attacked in the surf one night, he starts to think that things might be different this summer. At the same time, new girl, Talia, is causing friction between Jamie and his loyal mate, Tanner, and adds to his long standing tension with Dale's girlfriend, Kelly. But Jamie soon realises that romantic complications are the least of their worries.

The Mutineers are in town, a band of ancient vampires whose origins can be traced back to the (real life) shipwreck of the Batavia off the West Australian coastline in 1629. They've worked their way onto the festival's line-up, and if their plans succeed, nobody in Rocky Head will survive to see out the new year.

3. How did you attract the attention of your agent?

I was a member of a writing group for a couple of years, and one of the other members was represented by her. He (very generously) offered to show her some of my work. I should mention though, I was represented by another agent prior to that, and I got that agent by sending a good old fashioned query letter. So there are lots of different ways to get there.

4. What's the coolest thing you've ever done?

My boyfriend and I quit career jobs and lived out of the back of a car for a couple of years while we worked and surfed our way around Australia. It was a very free way to live, but that's not why I think it was cool. The reason I think it was cool was that it stripped away a lot of the ego and crap I had been hiding behind up until then, which was kind of painful, but ultimately meant I could reinvent myself. If I hadn't done that I don't think I'd be writing today.

5. Is that picture on your website a fake, or ...---------- Lauren! Do I have to answer this? I feel embarrassed. It's not a fake, BUT I was five months pregnant at the time, which I think helped me out a bit!

(How modest, Kirsty. But there's nothing wrong with admitting that you're super gorgeous!)

6. What can aspiring authors expect on the road to publication?

Well, if they're like me, a lot of ups and downs - so don't give up. I'm going to borrow from a post I did on my website here, but this is what it was like for me (takes a deep breath): I wrote a thriller which got me a UK agent who put it up for auction but nobody bid which was funny/terrible so I tried again and wrote something else which should have been ’same, same, but different’ but turned out to be just different and as a result lost the UK agent (understandably) but got some okay feedback from a publisher but still no interest whatsoever which left me wondering if I was going backwards and feeling pretty low for a while before I started work on two new stories which fascinated the hell out of me even if I didn’t know what they were or where they belonged and they got me an Australian agent who turned out to be incredibly generous and organised some excellent feedback on how I could improve those stories so I worked really hard to address that feedback and while I was doing it I suddenly realised I didn’t care about outcomes anymore and that I loved the creative process more than anything else and not long after I realised this – in a sort of epiphany while I was sitting in the audience of a literary festival – I found out those two stories were getting published. Go figure.

7. Paper or plastic? Paper.

If you haven't read her stuff, trust me, it's awesome. And she's such a sweetheart! Visit her website author of awesomeness. Ok, so it's not really called that, but it totally should be.

Waiting on Wednesday

2010-09-01T03:46:00.000-07:00

A weekly event hosted by Jill (breaking the spine)

Bad Taste in Boys by Carrie Harris
Releasing July 11, 2011

Goodreads summary: Super-smartie Kate Grable gets to play doctor, helping out her high school football team. Not only will the experience look good on her college apps, she gets to be thisclose to her quarterback crush, Aaron. Then something disturbing happens. Kate finds out that the coach has given the team steroids. Except . . . the vials she finds don’t exactly contain steroids. Whatever’s in them is turning hot gridiron hunks into mindless, flesh-eating . . . zombies.

Unless she finds an antidote, no one is safe. Not Aaron, not Kate’s brother, not her best friend . . . not even Kate . . .

It’s scary. It’s twisted. It’s sick. It’s high school.

Ok, first of all: The cover. T-H-E C-O-V-E-R! Soooo amazing! I mean, I could stare at that thing all day. I'm not the biggest fan of zombies, but this book sounds a lot a fun. Definitely one for the shelf.

Have I posted this before?

2010-08-31T01:07:00.000-07:00

Well, too bad, I'm doing it again!

Stalkers love me

2010-08-28T01:05:00.000-07:00

I'm just so stalkable. Pure awesomeness does that to people. Just sayin'.

Anyway, say hello to my brand new additions to the family!

Welcome loverlies! I'm so pleased to have you here, you don't even know. Help yourselves to the fresh fruit bar and extensive movie collection. Later there will be pedicures, so look forward to that. I know I will! Feel free to introduce yourselves in the comments and chat it up.

In other news, still waiting on news of a very awesome full ms that's in the hands of a very awesome agent. Keep you posted.

In preparation for the query process...

2010-08-27T02:54:00.000-07:00

I've compiled a list of certain things a writer should do before and during the exciting journey of querying agents. There are only seven main things you need to know, and they're very important, so you may want to bookmark this post to look at later.

1) Finish writing the book. Agents don't wanna read your crap. So rewrite, rewrite, rewrite, take a lembas break, then turn that crap into gold! And then go write another book they'll actually want.

2) Get someone else to write your query for you. You're a fiction writer, you can't write business letters. Business letters are for intellectuals and awesome people who write. You are obviously neither of these, so hire someone else.

3) Learn how to use Twitter. It's like putting a bunch of Facebook statuseses up. Just write stuff nobody understands or cares about, you'll get the hang of it. Welcome to the ninties!

4) Make out with your hot boyfriend/husband in a public place with lots of mothers and little children around. If you don't have the guts to do that, how are you going to withstand the query process? Besides, it's really fun.

5) Open doors for people. You never know if someone may be an agent in disguise.

6) Never send an agent cake with your query. If you don't send the right flavor they'll be totally offended.

7) You're going to be doing a lot of waiting. Get yourself a lot of books, movies, games etc. Or, like, freeze yourself in carbonite for a couple of weeks.

And there you go!

Goodnight

2010-08-26T16:17:00.000-07:00

Goodnight, all. Something to remember me by.

Writing Meme!!!

2010-08-26T02:52:00.000-07:00

Hey guys, got this from Lynda of On the Write Track. If you want, paste the questions into your own blog and answer as you please.

A Writer’s Meme

What’s your favorite genre of writing?

It used to be strictly fantasy, but now I’m sort of into them all.

How often do you get writer’s block?

That’s like asking how often do you go to the bathroom. At least three times a day. More, if I've had too much fiber.

How do you fix it?

Just write through it. Even if you come up with crap (which you will) one small idea, one sentence, one action of a character can help steer your story in the right direction again.

Do you type or write by hand?

Whichever is handy. I always copy my writing onto the computer as soon as I get home, though.

Do you save everything you write?

That reminds me: I lost some of my work by way of crappy floppy disk. Thanks for bringing up painful memories.

Do you ever go back to an old idea long after you abandoned it?

Fo’ sho. The older ones are usually the better ones.

Do you have a constructive critic?

Nope. I have friends who shower me with praises and say "Oh... that's nice" when my imagination gets a little crazy, but the only constructive one is me.

Did you ever write a novel?

I think you mean “did I ever finish writing a novel?” I’ve written like a million… and they were either put into the draw, turned into short stories, or were just silly things I wrote while waiting for writer’s block to clear up.

What genre would you love to write but haven’t?

Historical, maybe. Or scifi (not syfy). But both take way too much research, and that is my worst nightmare! But if I do a steampunk I can kill two birds with one mech.

What’s one genre you have never written, and probably never will?

Historical. Or scifi.

How many writing projects are you working on right now? Like seven. Even if it is God's perfect number, it sure makes it hard to finish one.

Do you write for a living? Do you want to? I’m a student for a living. Except you don’t get paid for that, so let’s just say I’m a moocher. I would love to write novels for a living, though. Tis my dream.

Have you ever written something for a magazine or newspaper?

School newspaper, but our paper never actually got published. Sooo… guess that's a no.

Have you ever won an award for your writing?

Someone told me that I should win an award. Does that count?

Do you ever write based on your dreams?

All the time. I have the weirdest dreams ever.

Do you favor happy endings, sad endings, or cliff-hangers? Bittersweet ones. The happy ones are annoying and unrealistic, the sad ones are annoying and depressing because they're too realistic, and the cliffhangers are just annoying (unless they're at the middle of a series or something.)

Waiting on Wednesday

2010-08-25T03:52:00.000-07:00

A weekly event hosted by Jill (breaking the spine)

Paranormalcy by Kiersten White
Releasing August 31, 2010

Goodreads summary: Sixteen-year-old Evie's job is bagging and tagging paranormals. Possessing the strange ability to see through their glamours, she works for the International Paranormal Containment Agency. But when someone--or something--starts taking out the vamps, werewolves, and other odd beasties she's worked hard to help become productive members of society, she's got to figure it out before they all disappear and the world becomes utterly normal.

I know this is really close to the release date, but I just couldn't help myself! I got to read a couple of pages online, and it got me super pumped for the release. That cover is gorgeous, but it really does make the writing seem more serious than it is--this story is hilarious and the writing is so witty and light I just couldn't stop reading. Can't wait to read the whole thing when it's released.

Leaving on a jet plane

2010-08-23T03:28:00.000-07:00

Actually it's more like a minvan packed with suitcases and four other adults for a 8-12 hour ride. (Why 8-12? 'Cause I don't know which it is. Anything within that range is marginally accurate.) Gonna be out of town. Yay! Except it's for a funeral. Boo! And the after party. Yay!

It's actually really pointless to post this, since I've got pre-posted posts ready to post for later posts. But whatev.

It's sunday! SUNDAY!

2010-08-22T03:40:00.000-07:00

Must repeat for emphasis. You know this to be true.

Anyway, I know no one blogs on sundays, but I'm doing it! Thinking of starting a vlog. What do you think? Don't you want to see me? Of course you do. Guess that means I'm doing that vlog! The people have spoken.

PS-- does anyone else think that the sequence of "know no one" is awesome, or am I just weird? It's homonyms followed by symmetrical letters of n and o (plus an e, but whatever).

Ok... yeah. I'm just weird. But weird and cute, which makes it totally ok.

Awesome Agent

2010-08-21T17:16:00.000-07:00

Does anyone know how to contact literary agent Selwa Anthony? Because I REALLY want to be represented by here. Yeah, I know, I'm American and she's an Australian agent, but I think we would work really well together. And the books she's represented look awesome.

I recognize this book from the internet! Yay!

Pretty color. I totally love this agent!

Ok, gorgeous cover.

I must get in touch with this agent ASAP! She doesn't have an address on her website, so I take it she only reads by recommendation or request. The coolest agent ever and there's no way I can get in touch with her. Just my luck...

In other news, the deadline for my first draft is going to have to be pushed back to the end of next week. My great grandma just passed away so I must away through a couple of states to attend the funeral... and miss the first day of school, too. Well, that's life for ya.

Takes a lot of munnies!*

2010-08-20T03:27:00.000-07:00

Ok. Whoa.

Did anyone else know that "monies" is a real word? I just saw it on a literary agent's webpage and was like "These people are awesome, using a fake word with so much panache!" and come to find out it's real. Really. I'm blown away right now, because it just sounds so fake... it's brilliant.

I always spell it "munnies" cuz that's how I say it as a joke, but...I don't know, maybe it's not so funny anymore. Well, actually, it is. Still funny. Cuz it still sounds fake.

Just goes to show that if you pay attention you can learn something new everyday.

*Anyone in SAI will know what that means. And if you don't your music umbrella is broke!

Laurens of the world, UNITE!

2010-08-19T03:30:00.000-07:00

I wasn't joking about that sorority of Laurens. Did you think I was? That only means you haven't been here long enough.

My dream BFFs/ Lauren sisters:

Lauren Oliver

Lauren DeStefano

Lauren Kate

Lauren Baratz-Logsted

Lauren Henderson

Yep. I'm really excited about this! I should probably get one of my books published so I can make it official. But for now I'll just dream about The Sisterhood of Writing Laurens.

Waiting on Wednesday

2010-08-18T03:16:00.000-07:00

A weekly event hosted by Jill (breaking the spine)

Delirium by Lauren Oliver
February 1, 2011
Here's the summary from Goodreads:

Before scientists found the cure, people thought love was a good thing. They didn’t understand that once love -the deliria- blooms in your blood, there is no escaping its hold. Things are different now. Scientists are able to eradicate love, and the governments demands that all citizens receive the cure upon turning eighteen. Lena Holway has always looked forward to the day when she’ll be cured. A life without love is a life without pain: safe, measured, predictable, and happy.

But with ninety-five days left until her treatment, Lena does the unthinkable: She falls in love.

Ok, so this sounds A-M-A-Z-I-N-G! I'm, like, blown away. The plot is beautiful and brilliant, and I can't wait for this book to come out! People named Lauren have incredible minds, obviously. (I should start reaching out to all the authors named Lauren and become their friend. A sorority of Laurens!!!) Can't wait to see what happens to Lena when she falls in love!!!

WOW!

2010-08-12T09:41:00.000-07:00

No, not World of Warcraft. Waiting on Wednesday! If you don't know what that is, it's a weekly event hosted by Jill at Breaking the Spine that spotlitghts upcoming titles that you just can't wait to get your hands on! I know it's thursday today, but for some reason I was just inspired to start this up. Next week I'll post on the correct day (haha!)

Wither by Lauren DeStefano
To be released in March 2011

Here's the pit on her website (I heart cut and paste): What if you knew exactly when you would die?

Thanks to modern science, every human being has become a ticking genetic time bomb—males only live to age twenty-five, and females only live to age twenty. In this bleak landscape, young girls are kidnapped and forced into polygamous marriages to keep the population from dying out.

When sixteen-year-old Rhine Ellery is taken by the Gatherers to become a bride, she enters a world of wealth and privilege. Despite her husband Linden's genuine love for her, and a tenuous trust among her sister wives, Rhine has one purpose: to escape—to find her twin brother and go home.

But Rhine has more to contend with than losing her freedom. Linden's eccentric father is bent on finding an antidote to the genetic virus that is getting closer to taking his son, even if it means collecting corpses in order to test his experiments. With the help of Gabriel, a servant she trusts, Rhine attempts to break free, in the limted time she has left.

Honestly, this book sounds amazing! And so unique. And the cover rocks! And the author's name is Lauren, so that's a plus (I'm a bit biased). I love this book so much I wish Lauren and I were best friends. Can't. Wait. To. READ!

Untitled love story

2010-08-11T15:17:00.000-07:00

That seems to be the story that's flowing at the moment, so I'll go with it so I can get something done finally!

Wait, do you even know what I'm talking about? If you look at the side bar you'll see the progress of WIP manuscripts I've got going, and Untitled Love Story has the most going for it at the moment so I'm gonna see how long it takes to finish it. The first draft, I mean. And then there's draft 2 and 3, probably, and then edits.

Anyway, I wanna try and finish this first draft before school starts... so that's about two weeks. By August 22nd I want to have a completed romance to edit! Can I do it? Of course I can! As long as sunshine and free internet don't distract me.

IT IS SO ON! In two weeks I will inform you of my progress and my editing schemes. Believe it!

OMG! Celebrity encounter!!!

2010-08-06T08:32:00.000-07:00

I am soooooo geeked right now! Kimberly Pauley, author of Sucks To Be Me (see yesterday's post), just posted a comment on my blog. Yay! I haven't even responded yet 'cause I can't think of anything to say that won't make me sound like a braindead creepy weirdo. But I MUST respond. I haven't read a book as good as that in a while, and to diss the author would be one of the biggest offences I could ever commit. So I gotta come up with something endearing, smart, witty, and very un-psycho to say before the moment passes by! Any ideas?

In other news, did I just say OMG? Gross.

Sucks to be me

2010-08-05T09:30:00.000-07:00

Every picture I find is slightly blurry. What up wit dat?

So I'm reading Sucks To Be Me by Kimberly Pauley, and I gotta say that this may be the best YA novel I've ever read. Seriously. It's just so entertaining! This only thing though (SPOILER!!!) is how can someone not realize that their crush is complimenting and chatting it up with their best friend. Wouldn't they be a little jealous? (SPOILER DONE!!!)

Anyway, besides that it's a really fun read... and I'm only a fourth of the way through the thing! Just wanted to let you know in case you're looking for a good book or something.

And now my room smells like Mylanta mixed with weird air freshener mixed with poison. Should probably go investigate that.

It's August!! AUGUST!!!!

2010-08-01T07:04:00.000-07:00

Yep, it is. Just wanted to point that out.

I should now leave you with something cute... or disturbing... or hilariously funny (I had to be redundant in this post at least once). You be the judge.

Kids Reenact MTV’s "The Hills" - Funny videos are here

EDIT!!!: Oooooooor not. Until the video decides to work again I'll have to add a substitute... cute couples!!!

It was a dark and stormy night...with Jude Law

2010-07-29T16:06:00.000-07:00

Sort of. Not exactly night time yet. Or dark. Or stormy. But close to it.

Anyway, all those brief sentences are getting annoying, so I'll type like a normal human now. Maybe. (Ok, that was just one for the road.)

You slay me Empress!

Thanks, Jude.

Annnnnd SEXY FACE!!! Ok, continue.

Does anyone else (and I don't know why I'm asking because you all do) have a bunch of unfinished stories on their computers that you can't take you mind off of? Like, you want to finish them-- all of them-- but you don't know which one you should do first? That's sort of what's going on tonight.

I want to be a published author. No, I want to make my living writing books (preferably YA). So, as you can imagine I want my first book to be the right one. People are going to look at this book and be like "Oh snap, so that's what kind of writer she is," and I want that kind of writer to be the kind of writer I want to be? Savvy?

Whatchu' talkin' 'bout, Empress?

Wait, Jude, let me finish. Soooo, deciding which story to finish, clean up, and send out into the world of agents is a huge decision. I know I can eventually write whatever genre I feel... but what do I want to be known for at the start of my career? I have a Humourous Chick-lit, a Serious Horror, a Freakishly Strange But Wonderful Fantasy, a Contemporary Love Story, and Another Fantasy Which Is Not So Freakishly Strange But Still Wonderful.

I wanted to be famous for my Freakishly Strange But Wonderful Fantasy, but the agents seemed to think it was a little too... how shall I put it?... freakishly strange. So I'm working on my Serious Horror, but it's so serious it doesn't feel like me; not the me I want to put out into the world at first, anyway.

So, what to do? Should I just suck it up and finish one? Does it really matter which one I put out first?

And why do people always confuse the seventh of a chord and the leading tone? They're totally not the same!

Calm down, Jude, remember your reputa-- uh... well... nevermind.

Avatar gives my slow day juice

2010-07-23T12:45:00.000-07:00

Today is so slow. I have a feeling that after you've had a couple of days of fun, your life just runs out of good ideas for a little while; like, it didn't expect you to have so much fun at once and it doesn't know how to think fast enough. Or else I'm just avoiding some responsibilities and can't find anything better to do instead. Yeah. That's probably it.

Either way, this is a slow day.

BUT I've been hearing rumors that there's going to be a spin-off of Avatar: The Last Airbender (The cartoon, not the movie. Because no one would make a spin-off of that piece of crap.) It's supposed to be more mature than the last one, which I'm thinking might make it more like a Miyazaki film. Except it's on Nickelodeon, so there probably won't be any limbs and blood lost. Plus, Aaang and Katara's son is gonna be in it! Yay!

Really? That's all I could muster up? News about a spin-off?

This IS a slow day.

Something Like Fate

2010-07-21T16:48:00.000-07:00

So, I finally went out and bought one of the big YA books of 2010. Actually, this is the first one I've read so far, period, and the year is half way done already! I usually wait for the paperback edition, but I've been hearing about this book for months and months and I've wanted to read it ever since I saw the cover.

Look at that cover! Adorable colors! And even though I wasn't overly impressed with the prose, the story was just so good I couldn't put it down. I mean, if I fell in love with my best friend's boyfriend I don't know what I'd do! But I do know what I would do if my best friend fell in love with my boyfriend {pulls up sleeves of awesome yellow shirt and searches for brass knuckles in the closet*}

This is a great beach book and an easy read... and it got me one book closer to reading all the YA books of 2010. One down, a million-ish to go.

*note-- I do not have brass knuckles in my closet, but if I did you would not see me wearing them with a yellow shirt. Brass and yellow? That's just tasteless.

Twins!?!?!?

2010-07-01T14:50:00.000-07:00

I've been gone forever! I know. No excuse, except that I wanted to focus on my real life and stop travelling to the Matrix so often.

Anyway, I just wanted to show you this...
Look at this! Same stock image. Am I a nerd with too much time on my hands, or am I just that awesome?

Happy Fahvers day!!!!

2010-06-20T07:24:00.000-07:00

This is from last year, but it's still good!

I will...

2010-06-16T05:11:00.000-07:00

White elephants?

Check.

Sitting ducks?

Check.

Little babies eyes... eeeeyes... eeeeeeyes! *creepy stare*

.......

Check.

Statistics homework?

Working on it...

A novel challenge

2010-06-12T07:01:00.000-07:00

So me and a friend of mine have decided to become critique buddies for our writing and, actually, we have a whole awesome system going.

We're each writing brand new novels, and we trade one chapter every friday. That means we have to write a new chapter every week! Which totally keeps me on top of it (sort of). We just started last week, so I gotta get going on chapter two for this week.

So far, so good. We'll see how far this can go.

My new blog

2010-06-11T13:12:00.000-07:00

I just created a new blog... but I would advise you not to go to it.

Well, ok, if you insist.

It's just something I put together for fun, so if you're looking for advice or intelligence then it's definitely not the blog for you. But if you think you're brave enough, head on over. I'll be having comic shows and such. If you wanna know more click the link.

http://periwinklepurrate.blogspot.com/

I heart Vampires!!!

2010-06-09T12:54:00.000-07:00

Drake Bell is on "I <3 Vampires" season 2!!! I didn't even know there was a season 2 until today!

So much to catch up on...

http://www.take180.com/show/I_Heart_Vampires/h1a

Just wondering...

2010-06-03T08:58:00.000-07:00

Why is Rock, one of the most energetic styles of music ever created, named after an earthy inanimate object? I for one would definitely do it for the irony effect.

Awww, poor Bella...

2010-06-02T16:32:00.000-07:00

Uh, not really.

This article rubbed me the wrong way.

People get raped every day for real and you're complaining about a little picture? Grow up. Because, honestly, nobody feels sorry for the fact that you're famous. Seriously. Complaining is just making you sound ungrateful and unlikeable.

And anyway, don't all good actors do a little research if they're considering a role? You had to have known how popular the book series was before signing onto the movie. Can't complain about attention that you yourself solicit.

I'm mad. Time to go watch a Jack Black movie to cool me down.